The Initiation (1984)

dir. Larry Stewart


[This review is part of the Final Girl Film Club.]

Remember two weeks ago when I complained of the blah nature of Wes Craven’s by-the-book slasher picture Deadly Blessing? Well, you would think I'd have similar complaints about the rote The Initiation. It does, after all, revel in all the trappings of early-to-mid eighties slasher pictures.

Scantily clad/nude coeds: check

[I really hope leering Tom Selleck posters were the norm in eighties dorms.]

Rad flashback/dream sequence imagery meant to explain the subsequent murders/obfuscate the identity of actual killer: check

[Ubiquitous eighties blue light: check]

Creepy disfigured man with an axe to grind/red herring meant to distract us from the identity of the real killer offing scantily clad/nude coeds: check

[Where's my Mask movie?]

Crazy people: check

[We got cages of 'em up in this bitch.]

Slacking night watchman who gets done in by killer because he's all, like, not paying attention and stuff: check

[OK, here's a movie cliche I never got: the night watchman looking at porn when he should be working. Now I'm not saying I don't get the not-working part. Anyone who has ever had a boring job full of not being supervised knows that slacking off is inevitable. It's just that I've never looked at porn when I wasn't masturbating. I don't see the point. It's like drinking non-alcoholic beer—an act whose only purpose is to give your liver blue balls. Why be a tease to yourself. If you're gonna do something, fucking do it. No need for your hand to be coy with your dick.]

Awesome 'staches: check

[You better believe that's a check.]

Fashions that would make Dov Charney cum: check

["Are you sure these are the shortest shorts wardrobe had available?"]

["Should I steal these sweet skates and roll the fuck out of here? Would that be too much of an eighties cliche?"]

[Fuck it.]

A theme party in which everyone shows up in wacky costumes: check

[Pictured: Giant dick.]

["I can't wait for us to go have sex with our girlfriends. Hey, did you see that giant penis? Can I see your penis?"]

Handsome boyfriend of female lead: check

["What's that, mirror? You say a handsome man wants to say hi?"]

[Pictured: Boyfriend more interested in scotch than girlfriend. Not pictured: the fact that she started dating her psychology professor after he gained her trust through hypnosis, and the dredging of painful childhood memories. Also pictured: healthy relationship.]

Constantly irritated character whose face is frozen in a permanent "Oh, you figured out that her dreams are actually repressed memories and now you're all like, 'Oh, I just discovered something groundbreaking,' when I was the one who figured that shit out first and told you about it multiple times; but now you're making like it's your brilliant discovery" sneer: check

[Sure, I'll pretend this is a cliche.]

[Yeah, I have no idea who she's looking at here. Grip?]

Taunting of heroine by killer: check

["Sweet, the killer knows my name."]

Plot twist in which the evil twin of the heroine is revealed as the killer: check

[Spoiler: check]

Final freeze frame of heroine set to the musical accompaniment of a sweet, sexy sax tune: check

[Not pictured: What the fuck?]

But still, I found the movie much more enjoyable than Deadly Blessing.

Dave's Rating: